Saturday, June 12, 2010

I remember...

I remember this place...
18 years of my life.
Laughter and tears,
Triumphs and defeats.

I remember this place...
Christmas morning and presents
And staring out the window
At the freshly fallen snow.

I remember this room...
Screams and shouting,
Tears of agony
And lying defeated on the floor.

I remember this place...
The smell of her skin,
The sight of her smile,
And the echo of her laugh reverberating through the halls.

I remember this room...
The sound of her swearing,
The shattering of the lamp,
And the sickening snap that a bone makes when it breaks.

I remember this place...
Minute-maid fruit punch ice pops,
Rice krispies treats,
And apples and cheese on a plate for lunch.

I remember this room...
The loss of composure,
And the way her eyes narrowed
When she told me I was the biggest mistake she ever made in her life.

I remember this place...
The frost on the grass
On a February morning
And sitting in the warm car while waiting for the bus.

I remember this room...
The splintering of wood,
Hiding in the darkness of the closet,
And the destruction of the coat rack as it shattered over my thigh.

I remember this place...
Birthday parties and proms
And standing together as a family
Smiling for pictures on the day of my sister's wedding.

I remember this room...
The sound of the thunder
And the way my lungs forgot how to breathe
On they day they told me that her cancer had become terminal.

I remember this place...
Playing in the pool with my cousins,
Hide and seek in the dark,
And having the family over for my grandmother's 75th birthday.

I remember this room.
The fear in my heart,
Fumbling to unlatch the lock
And running as fast as I could to get to the safety of my grandfather's house...

I remember this place...
Setting the table for dinner,
Laughing with my sister,
And the smell of a pot roast simmering on the stove.

I remember this room...
Watching her pick up the curling iron,
And the anger in her face
As she told me to get the fuck out of her house and never come back.

I remember this place...
Packing my things,
Heading for freedom,
And having the courage to seek more from life...

It was the best thing she ever did for me...

1 comment:

outdoor.mom said...

wow you have been through a lot. may the Grace of God surround you as you as you move forward.....